HOUSE, n.
A hollow edifice erected for the habitation of man, rat, mouse, beetle, cockroach, fly, mosquito, flea, bacillus and microbe. _House of Correction_, a place of reward for political and personal service, and for the detention of offenders and appropriations. _House of God_, a building with a steeple and a mortgage on it. _House-dog_, a pestilent beast kept on domestic premises to insult persons passing by and appal the hardy visitor. _House-maid_, a youngerly person of the opposing sex employed to be variously disagreeable and ingeniously unclean in the station in which it has pleased God to place her.
--Ambrose Bierce - The Devil's Dictionary